As a wise man by the name of Paulo Coelho once said, how people treat the others, tell a lot about the way they feel about themselves.
Every single relationship that we have formed, can be viewed as a reflection of the relationship we have towards ourselves.
By listening to our own thoughts, emotions, feelings and by believing in ourselves we become authentic, which gives us an amazing opportunity to be comfortable in our own skin. However, when we aren’t comfortable with who we are then we can’t accept ourselves and we project onto others.
You are judgmental.
Life is a mirror that reflects back to the thinker what he thinks into it, according to Ernest Holmess.
Every time you go against someone whether if it’s in their face or behind their back, you meet a glimpse of your own shadow. Turn those words back at you because only that is what will help you accept, heal and alchemize yourself.
Being rude and hateful towards someone is a sign that you aren’t comfortable with who you are and you’re too hard on yourself.
Another thing is that when we judge others we are hurting another person based on the way we perceive the world which isn’t always the right way of seeing things.
You seek validation from others.
It is clear that there is something missing when we are constantly seeking for others’ validation and attention. Sooner or later that void in ourselves needs to be filled and without the necessary tools, we will search for an external reaction of others.
What if we told you that you can be that cause and its reaction? What you seek from others is something that you too, have. You already know the answers and you don’t need anyone else. Measure yourself and set your bar high because you are worth it.
You put yourself last.
Constantly putting yourself last and doing things for others can feel joyful and rewarding, however, don’t be scared to show some sacred selfishness of putting yourself in the first place and putting your needs in front of everyone else’s.
You constantly do things you dislike.
It doesn’t matter if it is a lifestyle, a relationship or a job, repeating the same energetic cycle is unhealthy and can only lead to horrible emotional problems such as anxiety and depression.
If you feel like you’re stuck on a rat wheel – it is time to get off and do something new.
It might not feel good at the moment, but after that, you will thank yourself for what you did.
Anger is the strongest sign that something must be changed.
Anger is a face of our ego and can appear for many reasons. It is a sign that your current situation doesn’t satisfy you emotionally and physically. Your basic needs don’t meet up you and your ego is telling you that you deserve better.
You listen to others too much.
Do you remember who you were before the world told you what you should be?
Our parents, friends, bosses and co-workers can all hand us advice of how they think we can improve, but this doesn’t always mean that we should accept it. Do what feels right and what feels best for the real you and don’t let anyone else come up with decisions for you.
You tell small lies.
Even the littlest lie is a reflection of your self-confidence which is why you must never lower yourself in order to impress someone else and make them feel good about themselves. Be who you are and brush off anyone who doesn’t respect the truth, since they aren’t worth your time.
You mask your emotions.
Since my early age, I was aware of the difference between the emotions and feelings, and I always separated them. I learnt that my emotions occurred on the basis on my instance (whenever I was hurt or wronged in the most difficult times of my life). On the other hand, the feelings were the inner knowledge of finding me who I really am, and they served me as a guide in the future life.
In most of the cases, people don’t differentiate between emotions and feeling and try to hide what they feel because of the fear what they find deep inside them or from the inability to comprehend.
When we want to flush away the emotions, we use alcohol, cigarettes, drugs or anything else which distract us from the facing the real problem directly.
You can’t take the bad with the good.
You might not add another drop in your cup if it’s full. In cases when we can’t let go the past experience (by working on them psychologically, spiritually, or emotionally) then we feel like we can’t stand one more bad anymore.
It’s in our nature, to seek the fun-filled aspects in life. This is also known as a crisis in the mid-life. It happens as a result of holding something inside and avoiding it for so long. However, at a certain point in life, they will find their way to appear again. As soon as we are ready to surrender to our suffering and pain, we will be relieved and ready to make new beginnings. Lesson learnt: empty your cup because the whole point of suffering is to awaken your soul.
You’re hard on yourself.
Personally, I think that humility and self-acceptance fall hand in hand. I am not one of the people who think that all people make mistakes. It’s like we say we are perfect the way we are.
The purpose of life is to learn while growing. As soon as we forgive ourselves for the things we weren’t aware of then, and we know now, we will release the burden to love and acceptance. Just drop the bag that you have been carrying on too long.
You don’t trust your intuition.
All of us have instincts which guide our process of decision-making. It’s up to us whether we are going to listen to this inner voice or not.
You’re not following your heart.
The heart knows even before your mind processes your feelings. In such cases, you receive nudges (internal knowing) if you should or not proceed in that life-situation. Most of the times that soft nudges are buried by brains emotional triggers that cloud the mind.
That’s why it’s said not to make hasty decisions. Give yourself the time to separate your inner knowledge (feelings) from your emotions. Once you do that, you will trust yourself. Trust your instincts and know that, in love and in life, everything will find its way.