The majority of people think that a soul mate is the perfect match for your character, and if we’re being honest that is what everyone wants.
However, according to Elizabeth Gilbert, a true soul mate is the mirror person that shows you everything that is holding you back as well as the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life.
The image for a soul mate has been held onto the misconceived romantic notion of a perfect person, as the one man or women that will stumble in your life and fix all your broken pieces, making you complete.
However this concept is highly inaccurate, in regards to a soul mate being really just a mirror.
To start off, when we first start believing that another person is required for us to be whole, we’re unconsciously calling ourselves “incomplete” and this is wrong. We have the power in us to achieve that completeness, which is why we should never try to find the answers to our problems within another person.
By thinking we’re incomplete halves meant to become whole, we’re just searching for others who see themselves as halves as well, and this will just attract other people that feel like shattered spirits.
The reality is that it isn’t someone else’s life that we’re supposed to illuminate, but it is ours. This is just a subconscious way of getting your attention.
If you’re constantly saying that you’re in a dark place, then stop. The only light you should be seeing is the one coming from you.
Every single one of us has its light and darkness inside, and we vary in shades day by day, but we never fully become one or the other. This is why we sometimes feel moments of darkness but another day we feel the light balanced and restored.
A soul mate isn’t someone that is going to bring you peace by sacrificing themselves instead they will help you find that light within yourself, even if the lesson is a painful one, such as a heartbreak, that will motivate you to be a better person.
There are people in our lives that will teach us to pick up our broken shards without being afraid of bleeding, and their lessons are the things that will teach us to accept ourselves and to be our own soul mates, teach us to be the one that will make us whole.
A soul mate doesn’t have to be your lover, but it can be your friend, family member, anyone that has the role of a“glue” in your life.
A wise quote from Tarryn Fisher, says that the difference between the love of your life and a soul mate is that one is a choice, and the other one isn’t.